Monday, August 20, 2007

I can't take it anymore...

I am getting quite uncomfortable now. I also feel like my hormones are out of whack because I feel like I might cry at any given moment. Last night I found myself watching other people's videos of their births on youtube, I'm getting so anxious. While I was watching one particular video, I felt like I was going to cry even though it was such a beautiful little video. I'm sure none of you care to watch it, but here it is and don't worry, you don't see anything gross. But you'll see that it isn't sad, it's just sweet.

Anyway, I'm ready to be done with this pregnancy. I joke around a lot and say "I don't want to do this anymore", but I really mean it. I wake up and remember that I'm still pregnant and I don't want to get out of bed. I get in the shower and try to shave my legs and have such a difficult time reaching all the way to my ankles that I just want to throw the razor and quit. I get out of the shower to get dressed only to find that my clothes don't fit anymore and I look in the full- length mirror and I can see my stomach hanging out the bottom of my shirt. I change my clothes over and over and I get so frustrated with every thing that I just want to cry and tell everyone to leave me alone. It's not cute anymore, not fun, and not comfortable. The things that I took for granted before are impossible now. When I'm putting on a pair of pants, I have to hold them with my left hand and bend to the left and put one leg in then the other. I can't just pull my pants up with both hands on either side of the pants. You might think that that's not a big deal, but trust me, it is.

Cambria is still very active and I don't enjoy that anymore. I find it painful some times and it even takes my breath away when she kicks me in the ribs. If I stand for too long my ankles get swollen and my feet hurt. If I sit for too long, I can't breathe and I feel pinching pains in my ribs. I have to pee constantly, I'm exhausted all the time, and through it all, I'm still working. I get very irritated with customers asking questions about my due date even though I know they have good intentions.

I know Cambria will be worth it all, I'm just having a hissy- fit today. I'm done.
-Alicia

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